Having worked in the training, learning and development industry for nearly 10 years, I have been in plenty of positions where I need to tell someone something that I don’t think they’re going to want to hear. It can be uncomfortable, it can feel awkward and sometimes, you don’t know how the person will react.
The old school tried and tested way of doing this is commonly known as ‘the shit sandwich’. This is when you tell the person something good, give them the ‘negative feedback’ bit and then finish off by telling them something good again.
While there are numerous ways to offer feedback, the conventional “good-bad-good” approach is not necessarily ineffective. However, I have concerns that this method may be too simplistic and can lead to feedback losing its significance and intended impact. It is crucial to avoid the temptation of relying solely on this approach and ensure that feedback is always thoughtful and purposeful.
Feedback is fuel
It is widely recognised that feedback is crucial in all areas of performance, be it professional or personal. Whether it applies to work, sports, or any task, feedback is instrumental in identifying areas of improvement and enhancing overall performance.
However, providing feedback can be a daunting task. This is why we tend to delay it and reserve it for specific occasions, such as annual or quarterly appraisals and performance reviews. Unfortunately, both the giver and the recipient of feedback often dread these meetings. The giver may struggle with how to deliver the feedback constructively, while the recipient may feel anxious about the impending conversation and may already be planning their response.
Feedback should be continuous. In my recent post about the transformation of culture at Toulouse FC, the staff within the organisation requested more feedback to create an environment where they were allowed to fail. They didn’t want to hear feedback when it was too late to act upon it. In their book ‘Trillion Dollar Coach – The leadership playbook of Silicon Valley’s Bill Campbell’ Eric Schmidt, Jonathan Rosenberg and Alan Eagle discuss the legendary Bill Campbell’s approach to giving feedback;
“An important component of providing candid feedback is not to wait ‘A coach coaches in the moment,’ Scott Cook says. ‘It’s more real and more authentic, but so many leaders shy away from that.’ Many managers wait until performance reviews to provide feedback, which is often too little, too late. Bill’s feedback was in the moment (or very close to it), task specific and always followed by a grin and a hug, all of which helped remove the sting.”
It’s important to note the last bit about removing the ‘sting’ of feedback. People will respond to feedback in different ways, and it can be painful to receive. Especially if the feedback has been candid and to the point.
Feedback vs Criticism
One thing that bothers me is when people mask criticism as “constructive” feedback. While the intention behind such criticism may be well-meaning, it may not necessarily be constructive for the person on the receiving end. At the end of the day, criticism is still criticism. In his book “Coaching for Performance,” Sir John Whitmore highlights that excessive criticism can lead to damaged relationships. Criticism is a negative way of communicating and hinders the learning process.
When we are too quick to criticise, we inadvertently create a culture of blame, fear, and judgment. People feel threatened when subjected to criticism, which can lead to conflicts. In a blame culture, individuals may hesitate to use their own initiative to improve, while judgment can stifle creativity. Labeling criticism as “constructive” does not change the underlying negative connotation associated with it. Whether criticism is constructive or not, it can still evoke a defensive reaction in individuals.
In the book “Trillion Dollar Coach,” a key takeaway was Bill Campbell’s ability to provide direct and honest feedback to his teams and individuals. This was made possible because he had fostered a safe and comfortable environment for feedback. Campbell took the time to build personal relationships with the people he coached and worked with. This allowed him to know what he could say and how individuals would respond to his feedback. Under his leadership, teams developed a culture of openness and continuous feedback. They were able to provide feedback to one another and critically analyse their own performances.
Psychological Safety
Prior to delivering feedback, it is important to ensure that the environment is conducive to receiving it. This could mean providing feedback privately or in front of peers, depending on the situation. Being aware of the individual or group dynamics is crucial in determining how feedback should be given and how it might be received.
Establishing a culture where feedback is a regular part of team interactions, rather than just in response to mistakes or performance reviews, can have a significant impact on individual and group performance. By fostering a psychologically safe environment, team members feel comfortable sharing ideas, admitting mistakes, and taking risks. This is essential for learning and development, as it allows individuals to give and receive feedback without fear of criticism. Such an environment encourages open and honest feedback on individual performance, leading to continuous improvement.
High performing teams are full of continual feedback, peer to peer feedback and openness on their own feedback. One of the key tools that I am now using is the ‘PPCo feedback and evaluation tool’.
- Pluses
- Potential
- Concerns
- Overcome concerns
A feedback technique that can leave individuals feeling motivated and clear on what they need to do is to identify the positives, explore potential areas for growth, collaborate on concerns, and focus on ways to overcome those concerns. It is recommended that individuals use this technique when evaluating their own performance as well.
In time and with the right environment, individuals can lead their own feedback process using this technique. They can start by identifying the positives and potential, and then assessing their concerns about their performance. This encourages self-reflection and critical thinking, as they may uncover concerns that the feedback giver did not notice. Collaborating on ways to overcome concerns can also be a beneficial process. While the feedback giver can provide direct instructions based on their experience and knowledge, it’s essential to prioritise input from both parties. By allowing the performer to establish their own solutions, they can take ownership of the feedback and feel more motivated to improve.
To ensure effective feedback is received and acted upon, the environment in which it is given must be taken into consideration. Cultivating a safe and supportive culture where individuals are encouraged to express mistakes, take risks, and be creative leads to higher performance. Continuous open and honest feedback is essential in such an environment. Criticism, on the other hand, can hinder learning and development, making it crucial to prioritise building a feedback-normalised environment instead of resorting to techniques like the “shit sandwich.”